Yesterday, a question was posed by one of my Facebook friends. I saw it as an opportunity to provide some biblical input. The gist of the question is this: If a woman leads properly would you support her and submit? I answered the question in relation to what God established as a covenant between one man and one woman (marriage) and how the husband is the head with the wife being the one who submits to his headship. I explained how this was God’s design and any deviation from that design would be detrimental.

Her response invited me to clarify what I meant by “design” and “detrimental” as those words stood out to her. I’m going to share with you now what my response was:

“God created the man first. Then, out of the man, he created woman. As far as human value is concerned they are equal. I’m no better than my wife. But notice how different God designed them. He made the man more muscular, taller, and with a deeper voice. He made him the protector. He made the woman the weaker vessel, more emotional and nurturing. He made women the avenue through which life comes into the world. Both of them have their roles. God designed it that way for the man to lead and protect his wife and his children. And he designed the woman to follow him and nurture the children and to be a good keeper of the home. Both roles are equally important but are very different in function.

The reason I use the term detrimental is because when we deviate from God’s order, we pay the price for it. Look at men and women today. Men are not leading, not marrying, and are sleeping with everybody. Resulting in single mothers who have to now play the role of provider, protector, and nurturer because the man is not in the picture. These things and more are the result of us redefining that which was already defined by our creator.

The question then becomes if God wanted men and women both to function the same, then why didn’t he make us the same? Why Even have a distinction between men and women if we were meant to serve the same purposes?”

The point of my answer is this. God is the dictionary.  He defines life, death, what we think, what we see, and yes even marriage. But he does this not to harm us, but to protect us and keep us. Following the order of God gives him glory. And that is the purpose for our lives.


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What I want the most is for this to not be about me. But rather the focus be placed on Jesus Christ; the author and finisher of our faith. I am just a vessel willing to be used by him and for him.

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